Went for a meal this evening with Bert the Slug. Bert obviously had to be hidden in my pocket otherwise we wouldn't have been allowed into the restaurant. I tried numerous times to coax him out but he refused believing that if he were visible then the staff and the patrons would throw a fit.
So, I ordered food for two looking like a real greedy guts and appearing to be a rather sad individual. I had to stealthily feed Bert his morsels, carefully putting bits and pieces of food into my pocket for him to eat.
Anyhoo, I got to the shrimp tempura when I was given a rather strange reddish-looking sauce to dip the tempura into. I did so and was revolted. I exclaimed, 'this tastes like vomit!' causing all the customers and staff to stare at me. I dipped a crumb into the sauce for Bert to try and he too agreed that the sauce did taste like vomit.
I alerted the waiter who refused to believe me and refused to try it. So naturally I did the only thing I could do which was to go home, get five cabbages then return and hurl them at the restaurant.
My slugs later returned contaminated the batter.
In Maputo I am known for my love of tinned tuna.